Are you a person who likes to please others at the expense of your own needs or interests? If so, you may be a people pleaser.
People pleasers often feel bad and feel guilty when rejecting other people. They are also reluctant to say no to anyone.
People pleasers usually only focus on pleasing others and fear of hurting the heart of the person they reject. Feelings of guilt and fear will only make mental health disturbed.
Not infrequently they experience stress to excessive anxiety because they are people pleasers.
So, what causes someone to become a people pleaser?
Quoted from Healthlinethere are several possible factors that cause a person to become a people pleaser, one of which is past trauma.
The behavior of always wanting to please others sometimes appears in response to the fear associated with the trauma. If a person has experienced trauma such as child or partner abuse, at some time that person may feel insecure about maintaining certain boundaries.
The person may have learned that it is safer to do what the other person wants and meet their needs first.
Although difficult, a person can stop being a people pleaser in several ways, such as:
1. Do good sincerely
Before offering help, consider your real intentions. Would this opportunity to help others make you happy or would you feel resentful if you didn’t?
2. Learn to set boundaries
Maintaining healthy boundaries is an important step in overcoming behavior that pleases others. The next time someone asks for your help, don’t be tempted to intervene.