It’s good to have the nature of forgiving other people’s mistakes in general. You will avoid vengeance. However, there are things you need to anticipate from this character of yours.
If you ignore it, forgiving nature can actually harm you. You don’t have to be easy to hate, but be aware of the following five things.
1. Can never be assertive
illustration of apologizing (pexels.com/Ron Lach)People who are aware of their mistakes and regret certainly need your forgiveness. However, how long will you be lenient with people who repeatedly hurt or harm you?
So that other people don’t easily repeat their bad deeds to you, firmness is needed. Only that will be able to encourage them to think again when they want to do something bad to you again.
2. Have no sensitivity about the seriousness of people in apologizing
illustration of apologizing (pexels.com/Liza Summer)There are people who apologize because they really realize their mistakes. He knew he couldn’t do that again. However, getting forgiveness from you will relieve his guilt-ridden heart.
But don’t be too naive, okay? There are also people whose apologies are just perfunctory. He apologizes simply because of the demands of those around you, for example.
This type of person usually apologizes in passing. His mistake was very serious, but he simply said sorry, then considered the problem solved. If you bear a loss, he does not show his responsibility.
Also Read: 5 Wise Steps to Stop Being a People Pleaser
3. Stuck in a toxic relationship
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illustration of a couple fighting (pexels.com/MART PRODUCTION)To get out of toxic relationship, you must be able to be assertive. Even though forgiveness is a virtue, giving it to someone who is toxic and then pretending there was never a problem between the two of you can trap you in an unhealthy relationship.
In fact, fix toxic relationship not easy at all. Perpetrators of violence will tend to keep repeating their actions, as well as victims have difficulty getting out of their power.
4. Feel guilty every time you get angry over other people’s bad treatment
brooding illustration (pexels.com/MART PRODUCTION)Not every other person’s faults need to be treated with anger. The reason is, not infrequently they just accidentally do it so you need to tolerate it.
It’s just that you still have the right to be angry, if someone openly treats you very badly. For example, he insulted your parents. There’s no need to feel guilty that you became angry with that person.
As long as there is a clear cause, anger is also a sign of healthy emotions. Wouldn’t it be strange if you felt happy or completely untroubled by his insults to your parents?
5. You are just being made a joke by others
illustration of laughing at friends (pexels.com/Keira Burton)Behind your back, people are actually being and always bursting out laughing. Why? Because someone who has been in trouble with you many times will think that you will definitely forgive them again.
This assumption is not just a figment because it has been proven to happen again. Whenever you easily forgive his mistakes, he feels victorious. Sorry if I surprised you, but some people think you are easy to fool.
Agree that forgiveness is a good act and needs to be appreciated. But as long as you’re dealing with humans who have diverse traits and motivations, you shouldn’t be too innocent, OK?
Also Read: 5 Good Things That Will Approach Forgiving People, Calm Hearts!
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