1. Feeling guilty when taking time for yourself
When you don’t love yourself, you often feel guilty about taking time for yourself. You feel that the time is better spent doing useful things for others, rather than doing pleasant things for yourself. You keep feeling guilty about doing things for yourself. In fact, taking a little time to do fun things can help you feel calmer. At that time, the brain can also process various things that you experience much better.
2. Stuck together toxic people
One quote about loving yourself is ‘Love yourself first before you love someone else‘. This quote is true, because when you still don’t love and respect yourself, it will be difficult to find someone else or a partner who will love and respect you. Often you will meet toxic people which will lower your confidence. In fact, no one has the right to degrade your quality, including yourself.
3. Always apologize, even for something you shouldn’t
Do you often subconsciously apologize? Or do other people often tell you to stop apologizing? If so, then you can say you don’t love yourself. In this case, the behavior of always apologizing refers to the behavior when you apologize when you didn’t do anything wrong, or when you apologize for someone else’s mistake. According to Sharon Martin, a psychotherapist, always apologizing can be a sign of perfectionism and you keep apologizing because you feel you’re not perfect.
4. Keep blaming yourself with past mistakes
According to Dr. Kristin Neff in “Self-compassion, The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself”, when you are still stuck with guilt from the past, you will feel that the only way to be motivated and keep going is to blame yourself for your mistakes. it continuously. In fact, constantly blaming yourself can make a person feel demotivated. It would be better if you are able to accept and forgive yourself so that you can keep going and survive without having to carry the burden of guilt from the past.
5. It’s hard to believe in yourself
According to Celestine Fedley, a stress management coach, believing in yourself is one way to love yourself. When you don’t love yourself, you often question whether your decision was good enough, whether you have the right to feel sad, whether you are allowed to do that, and so on. To overcome this, ask yourself what you are really afraid of. Give yourself time to think for a moment so you really know and understand your feelings.
Hopefully this information is useful, Fimela’s friend.
Written by: Savitri Anggita Kusuma Wardani